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My boyfriend and I are having another couple over for Christmas day (we're all away from home so hosting our own Xmas dinner). Basically, we'd like to get the other couple into bed at the end of the night and they have said they'll be up for it. But we're wondering how you actually move from eating turkey to having a foursome? How can we get things started?

Thanks, Trish

Gosh! There’s a novel end to Christmas day – whilst most of us are slouched on the sofa feeling stuffed, you’re planning to roll around the sofa, getting...

I’m going to have to assume that you are two straight couples (let me know these crucial details people; I learnt long ago not to make assumptions).

So with such a combination, I reckon if you make a pass at the female partner, it should get things going along quite nicely, as girl-on-girl can be a real turn on to the male of the species (and to the women!)

 It also limits any instant feelings of jealousy. Foursomes in fantasy sound fab, but the reality of witnessing your man kiss another girl (or vice versa) could make your blood boil rather than your underwear dampen.

 If you shake up the norm a bit, you can lessen the chances of this happening.

The other option is to forget monopoly as an after-dinner game and suggest strip poker or truth or dare instead.

Strip poker, of course simply removes clothing, but the old toe-curling pass still remains, which is why a saucy game such as Intimate Sex Game which has sexy questions, forfeits and actions to perform is an instant orgy in a box.

 
Hi Kathryn, Our work Christmas party is around the corner and I was wondering what you'd class as 'acceptable sexual behaviour' at such an event. Blowjob in the toilet? Full on sex on the boss's desk? Or just a boring snog under the mistletoe? 

 
Blimey! When most peeps merely get in a tizz over secret Santas or what to wear at the office do, you worry about “acceptable sexual behaviour”?  I can’t decide if you are a wild-child or stuck in the 1950’s!
 
Isn’t acceptable sexual behaviour anything that is mutually consensual and reciprocally desired?
 
If you and Angie from accounting, or Hamish from HR want get jiggy on the photocopier and distribute the zapped images as New Year cards, I may question your judgment but I ain't gonna judge!
 
Workplaces are a hotbed of gossip and office party antics are often the subject of whispered sniggers well into the following year. Sex that may have been hot at the time can quickly cool under the harsh spotlight of office politics.
 
Drinking vast quantities of cheap plonk (or any kind of plonk for that matter) is often the cause of injudicious trysts. As inhibitions lower, underwear often follows…
 
To ensure your moans are not ones of toe-curling embarrassment, I would say flirt to your heart's content, but keep your knickers on.

If neither is possible, then for god’s sake, pop some condoms in your purse!
 

I have started having feelings for one of the guys I share a house with (I'm a guy too). I'm pretty freaked out as I'm straight and have never been interested in men before. He's got a girlfriend but I'm sure he is attracted to me. What should I do? The thought of gay sex freaks me out, but I can't stop thinking about him.
 
That’s a tricky one! Not because a ‘straight’ man is having feelings for another ‘straight’ guy. Sexuality is fluid and I believe, whatever our sexuality or gender, most of us can feel an attraction to something, or somebody, other than our ‘norm’, whether we act on it or not.

To those who adamantly proclaim themselves to be 100% straight, or 100% gay, me-thinks you protest too much!

No, it’s the living together that’s the tricky bit. Coming on to him in the communal kitchen or making a pass in the porch may spark passion on a par with bareback mountain, but it may not…. and then you have to live with it, quite literally.

 It's also tricky that he has a girlfriend. I'm all for peeps exploring their sexuality, and certainly many a heady romance has left casualty partners behind, but she does deserve to be treated with respect in this.

 As you feel he's attracted to you, why not invite him out for a drink and tell him how you are feeling?

If he's not interested, then he should still be flattered - I doubt whether any 21st century guy would act Neanderthal about a bromance. 

  
BTW, Sex is sex. Passion is passion. There are no rules or regulations governing what constitutes “gay sex” (or “straight-sex”). The best sex leaves expectations at the bedroom door.

Sh! Women's Erotic Emporium is the UK’s first ever sex shop for women with stores in Hoxton Square and Portobello Rd.  Sh! is 100% run by women for women and couples. Men are welcome unaccompanied on Gents Nights, held in both stores every Tuesday.


 



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