Madonna (Warner Bros)

Celebration is billed as Madonna’s ‘third definitive best-of’, which perfectly sums up her label’s desperation to sell us back our pasts before the record industry is crushed under the weight of its own incompetence.

The non-chronological approach doesn’t work – squashed between Hung Up and Vogue, Music sounds tinny and feeble – but the big problem is that, well, is there anyone who wants this that doesn’t already have it?