Q. I met a girl on holiday and we had a pretty intense fling – I felt like I was into her but now sense it may have been a fleeting travel hook-up. Should I pursue her back in London?
Reuben says: There’s no prescribed minimum amount of time you need to spend with someone in order to like them.
For example, I fell head-over-heels in love with a woman called Kandii who I met online. We were only together for 10 minutes, but we loved a lifetime’s worth. I can assure you that, had my access not been revoked, I would still be with her, via her webcam, every single night. But then that’s just me – I’m a hopeless romantic.
Equally, you need to have the judgement to recognise a holiday fling. I recently went on a cruise and met a special lady. After passionate weeks together, ravishing each other in every dark corner between the bingo tables and the bowls green, we went our separate ways.
I returned to my life as a sexual empath and she went back to her assisted-living facility.
Ruby says: I often found myself in a similar situation when, between acting gigs, I worked as a hostess at a resort in the Canaries called Pleasure Island. It was popular with couples, some who would exchange partners during their stay with us.
I used to meet guys all the time; we’d get along well and I’d feel like there was a connection, but then they’d leave with their wives and that would be it. I realised I had only given myself to them in the carpark, on the tennis court, or wherever, because I was turned on by them being on holiday. Even if they’d called, I wouldn’t have had sex with them again.
My advice is, don’t shag London girls you meet abroad. Go for locals and hope they don’t follow you home.
» Got a sex or relationship worry? Email dearreuben@tntmagazine.com
