Greeted by enthusiastic camp mates at each step of the way, find gold stars in dark holes – grabbing the odd mystery furry, spiky and squidgy object –  answer I’m a Celebrity Questions, and if you get them wrong, you might be showered with a slippery or slimy surprise; and climb up a slope against ‘cyclone’ winds to get a gold star.

Suitable for kids, in truth the anticipation is a lot worse than the reality, so if you’re scared of all creatures great and small, you’ll still leave with clean pants.

I can’t promise that if you go on any of their big roller coasters though, with the awesome Stealth catapulting you from 0-80mph in two seconds, the chance to ride Hive backwards, Saw, which has more twists and turns than a soap opera, and Colossus, which is the closest you will ever come to being in a tumble drier, in case you ever wanted to be in one.

Just a 30-minute train ride out of London (closest station is Staines), make Thorpe Park your next day trip out of the city, and you won’t be yelling ‘Get me out of here!’

thorpepark.com