And if you thought the torch-shaped bonkable ‘Fleshlight’ was bizarre….well, we would respectfully suggest that you ain’t seen nothing yet.

Say hello to the quirky Vajankle – a replica dismembered left foot with a useable vagina lovingly crafted into the ankle for foot-loving kinksters to get their jollies. Simply rinse with soap and water afterwards.

The Vajankle will cost you a toe-curling $175 from Californian sex toy specialist Sin Boutique – and yes, it is only the left foot that’s bangable. However, if you prefer your silicone feet in pairs you can purchase an additional right foot – minus vagina – for decorative or self-trampling purposes.

The manufacturers insist they’re open to reasonable requests. For example, you can specify your preferred skin tone for the foot and even for the labia. French manicure and cherry nail polish are also available. On the down side they’ve turned down one inquiry for the vagina to be resituated in the sole, and have also ruled out the launch of a Vajarmpit.

One thing’s for certain. There’s no need for any self-respecting podophile – we said ‘podophile’ – to put their foot in it when they can now simply put it in their foot.

As for our own little predilections, well….what about a  shaggable bellybutton? Or a third eye for your one-eyed snake? Oh, come on – don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. No need to make us feel like a heel…