A dwarf pulling a vacuum cleaner with his genitals has been deemed too offensive to perform at St. Peter’s College at Oxford University’s summer ball, according to the university dean.

“Demon Dwarf” Dan Blackner’s act will be excluded from £75-a-ticket Circus of Horrors show on the May 7 university celebration.

Indignant of the university’s decision, Blackner responded by saying, “I have a brilliant résumé after featuring as an Ewok in a Star Wars film and various Muppet movies as a flying teddy bear.”

Other acts barred from the ball include Gary Stretch and his ability to cover his face with a flap of his own neck skin.

The Circus of Horrors troupe has been touring for over 15 years and advertises that their freak-show performance is not for “sissies.”

Doctor Haze, Horrors’ ringmaster had this to say: “It is ridiculous for the dean to try and decide what people should or should not see.”