Q. I’ve just split up with a long-term girlfriend and although I resolved to keep it together, I’m finding it really hard. How can I get over her?
Reuben says: How we deal with adversity is the true measure of our character. Sure, you could sit back, slowly working through your feelings and eventually coming to terms with the fact you’ve gone separate ways while developing a real appreciation of the time you spent together.
But that would make you a pussy, the kind of guy who allows his world to be shaped by other people and events outside his control.
I’ve actally written a series of self-help books that I think could be helpful – they take Neitzsche’s idea of the will to power and apply it to our everyday lives. I suggest you start with my first title, Cast Off Your Slave Mentality and Embrace Your Inner Amoral Superman.
It was very popular among survivalists, gun ownership activists and Chelsea fans.
Ruby says: The end of a relationship can be brutal. You’ll likely find yourself sitting in your apartment staring out the window at the rain, wondering if it’s raining where she is, while U2’s Without Or Without You plays in the background.
A montage of all the happy times you shared plays on a loop in your mind, maybe cutting away to her at opportune times, showing her getting on with her life, even though it’s hard.
By now, Roxette’s Listen To Your Heart is the soundtrack, like at the end of Pretty Woman, before Richard’s Gere rich businessman decided that, actually, he loved that whore and was going to make it work. Let’s be honest, I think we’ve all had our own ‘I love that beautiful sex worker’ moments over the journey.
But, yeah, anyway. Your lady has gone. She’s probably sleeping with another guy by now. Get over it.
» Got a sex or relationship worry? Email dearreuben@tntmagazine.com
