Aah, St Patrick’s Day, where getting inordinately drunk and singing loudly is par for the course.

Here’s our guide to where the craic is on March 17:

Irish Cultural Centre, Hammersmith

We dare you to leave in the state you arrived in, should you make your way to the Irish Cultural Centre, which is where a good portion of London’s Irish will be twinkling their toes to the sounds of a mean fiddler.
The Hammersmith venue is a traditional meeting place for anyone of the Hibernian persuasion.
On St Patrick’s Day, it is expected to be packed to the rafters, as Le Cheile, a longstanding band of the emerald vein, promises a barnstorming performance.
Also on the bill, and bound to whip the crowd into a frenzy is Celtic music band Beoga, acclaimed for their high energy performances.
irish Cultural Centre, Black’s Road, W6, Hammersmith Tube. 7pm. £18

St Patrick’s Day parade, Brent

Brent is hosting an all-out celebration from 3.15pm, with a parade setting off from Willesden Green Tube at 4pm, making it’s way to Willesden Green Library Centre.
The Birmingham Irish Pipes and Drums will lead the colourful procession, complete with floats and costumed dancers, which will culminate in folk music and Irish dancing, at the library centre, which you can listen to while you poke around the traditional food and gifts stalls.
Brent St Patrick’s Day parade, Willesden Green Tube. 4pm

Vinopolis

You can chow down on steak and Guinness pie along to the strains of classic Irish tunes at Vinopolis on March 17 and 18.
The venue is harnessing St Patrick’s Day to raise money for Comic Relief in an event, which also incorporates an Irish-themed tour, where you can sup wines, whiskey, beer, absinthe, gin cocktails and a pint of Guinness.
Be gosh and be gorah!
Vinopolis, 1 Bank End, SE1, London Bridge. Noon. £29.

Medieval Banquet

Put yourself in the presence of royalty on St Patrick’s Day, when King VIII hosts and evening of Irish revelry, with a dash of northern charm, at the Medieval Banquet.
The vaulted chambers of this resplendent venue will be transformed into an emerald hall with traditional Irish singers and musicians to compliment the feast.
Ale will flow by the flagon as dancing wenches serve up a four-course traditional Irish feast with unlimited ale and wine.
The show will feature a broadsword battle by noble knights and beautiful handmaidens serenading you with songs of Ireland
Medieval Banquet, Ivory House, St Katharine Docks, E1W  Tower Hill Tube. 7.15pm. £49.95

Waxy O’Connors, Soho

The party kicks off here at midday on March 17. This Irish institution in Soho will be celebrating throughout the day, with giveaways and live entertainment.
If you prefer more than a liquid lunch of Jamesons, Guinness and Magners, the kitchen will be whipping up will be plenty of Irish fare.
Throw into the mix music, singing, dancing and a great atmosphere and the party here is bound to go down as one of the biggest of the day.
Waxy O’Connors, 14-16 Rupert Street, W1D, Piccadilly Circus Tube.

Porterhouse, Covent Garden

Another popular drinking hole for the masses, the Porterhouse in Covent Garden is offering Irish stew and  Dublin Coddle for just £3.
Wash it down with some Irish Stout, while you glue your eyes to the box for the Cheltenham Races.
After the photo finish, from 4pm, the Irish jig begins, with live music from the band Hungry Grass.
Pints and this green, white and orange-tinged atmos will continue until Sunday, with the Ireland v England Six Nations test being shown on Saturday, March 19, and a wind-down the next day with
a traditional Irish Seisiun from 5pm.
Porterhouse, 21-22 Maiden Lane, WC2E. Embankment Tube.

Toucan, Soho

It’s all thanks to a bird with a silly beak that the Toucan pub is expected to be heaving on St Patrick’s Day.
The toucan was synonymous with advertising Guinness stout, and this popular little establishment is dripping with all such memorabilia.
When you’ve had your fill of  Guinness, there’s a huge selection of  Irish whiskey to have a crack at, too.
It’s speculated that it might even be one of the largest selections in the world. Get in early and you may score a free hat. But expect chaos.
Toucan, 9 Carlisle Street, W1D. Tottenham Court Road Tube

Zigfrid von Underbelly, Shoreditch

Paul Daly, designer of rock ‘n’ roll bar Zigfrid von Underbelly bar has conceived a limited-edition Jameson Irish Whiskey bottle and naturally, Zigfrid von Underbelly is throwing a party to celebrate.
Expect live Irish music all night until 3am, and a video link-up to other St Paddy’s parties taking place around the globe. Awesome.
Zigfrid von Underbelly, 11 Hoxton Square, London, N1, Old Street Tube.