I don’t really know where to start with this story, I’m just so happy that it happened in the first place. 

A Turkish born bodybuilder, dressed only in his underpants and high as a kite on a mixture of ecstacy and marijuana has somehow gained access to the private jet of German Chancellor Angela Merkel.

The 24-year-old strong man first was seen dancing on the Airbus 319’s wing, clutching a big bag of said drugs, before he somehow made it inside the jet. Once inside he messed around in the cockpit, spread fire retardant foam all around the cabin and even managed to release the plane’s emergency inflatable slide.

Oh, Volkan T, what will you do next? 

According to a report in the Daily Mail it took authorities four hours to remove the bulky intruder from the plane, which had more than eight tons of fuel on board. 

Cologne state prosecutor, Ulrich Bremer has ruled terrorism out as a motive. No man armed only with a pair of tight whities and a bag full of recreational drugs could be considered a terrorist threat – they’d be having far too much fun. 

“The investigation is focused on the charges of dangerous interference in aviation but also trespassing and damage to property,” Said Bremer to Spiegel Online. “As part of that probe it’s of interest how the accused got onto the site and into the plane.”

Volkan’s spree was only really discovered when, while playing with buttons in the cockpit, the 24-year-old triggered and alarm. 

The Daily Mail report that Volkan had been involved in a large argument with his girlfriend earlier in the day, which may have lead him to go on his drug fuelled binge which cause hundreds of thousands of euros worth of damage. 

Danke Volkan T, danke very much indeed!

Image: Getty