Q. A girl who I’ve been secretly in love with since university has just got married to another guy. Should I wait for her relationship to end or try to move on?
Reuben says: When I was living and working in Japan in the 1920s, there was a famous dog called Hachiko. His master, a university professor, died at work one day, but Hachiko continued to wait for him every day at the train station; every day until he died 10 years later.
Hachiko’s unending devotion to his master captured the hearts of the Japanese people – they erected a statue of him outside the station and this parable of love, loss and loyalty was eventually adapted into an equally inspiring Hollywood film, starring Richard Gere, called Hachiko: A Dog’s Tale.
For me, Hachiko’s story demonstrates that we should never forget those we love. Although Hachiko was a dog – an incredible one; he was an Akita, which is basically dog aristocracy – I think we should all aspire to the same kind of noble sacrifice.
Ruby says: Waiting out any relationship can be a trying experience; marriages are even tougher nuts to crack because the whole divorce wrangling is likely to add at least 18 months of lag-time. Basically, you have to hope she doesn’t lever out any little sprogs in the meantime, because then you’re in for a seriously long haul.
But patience is an over-rated virtue – maybe your best bet is to plant evidence of her man’s infidelity. My advice is to do it early, before your beloved gets too attached.
For a small fee, I would be willing to seduce him and then consumate in a seedy motel I use for these jobs, while you hide in the bushes outside with a long-lens camera.
I hope that doesn’t sound cynical. The heart wants what the heart wants.
» Got a sex or relationship worry? Email dearreuben@tntmagazine.com
