Since their YouTube series went totes viral, the Bondi Hipsters – Dom and Adrian, to the uninitiated – have become a pop culture phenomenon. These guys have turned their hands to everything: some fashion designing, a bit of rapping and DJing. Wherever the zeitgeist is headed, Dom and Adrian are already there, without even trying. Even though they’re the toast of Bondi, they’ve managed to keep it real and underground. Still, they’ve made the trip across to London for the Olympics, which, for the record, is probably the most try-hard thing ever. We caught up with Dom and Adrian– Dom’s the one with the beard – to chat about their incredi London adventure.
So are you excited about heading to London for the Games?
Dom: Why would I be excited about visiting a place that I have already spent several weeks in?
Adrian: Dom spent a bit of time in London back in his male modelling days. He was totes all over the London scene.
Dom: Yarh, at the time I was signed to Vivien’s so they had me on the door list of literally every club in London, every night. But I never went to clubs because everyone at night clubs are total try-hards and anything that you have to line up for isn’t worth going to. I used to just hang out at mad underground live music venues that nobody else had ever heard of. My favourite venues were these secret underground clubs in the London Tube tunnels, where you could just get off your face on pingers and watch guys in fluorescent jackets fix trains. It was so underground. There was literally nobody there, just me, and these guys working on the trains. And I would get so fucked up – I dunno how I would categorise their performance style but I suppose it was kind of percussive.
Your fans might not expect you to be that keen on sport – what persuaded you to head over for the Games?
Dom: Who actually cares about sports except for rednecks and money-grubbing PR chicks who desperately want to date sportspeople for their own self-promotion and to get their photo taken for the social pages of shitty magazines once every six weeks, so that they can say to their girlfriends, “Oh look at me and this D-list celebrity at the opening of some shitty restaurant”?
Adrian: We don’t want to watch any sports or find out any results or anything like that, we are just interested in getting some inspiration for our new fashion line, Athleticacaca – please spell that in Wingdings font – and since there will be so many sportspeople in one city at the same time, it might be a good opportunity for us to open our brand up to a wider audience.
What events do you like or dislike?
Dom: Personally I don’t give a fuck about any of them, but if I was to lie for the sake of sounding interested about the Olympics in your magazine, then I would say, ‘Yarh, man I like the most underground sports that nobody else cares about, like ping pong, shuttlecock and judo.” Are you happy? Thanks for making me lie, that’s so typical of you media types. Newspapers and magazines are all full of lies, unless they are exposing a truth, but in which case you don’t believe it because someone from the government will pass it off as a conspiracy. Free speech, my arse.
Adrian: Sorry, Dom’s just weird in front of the media.
Dom: I told you, I’m not cool with interviews. We should be doing our best not to say anything about anything and to make sure that people have no idea who we are.
Adrian: Anyway. I like the ones where you are most likely to see a nipple fall out. So, that’s mostly gymnastics, and athletics. You have to respect the ‘Shirvington effect’, too. That’s when a male sprinter gets an epic dick-swing going on. I’m not into dicks or anything but it’s just nice to watch Mother Nature at work.
Are there any athletes whose style or look impresses you?
Adrian: From a physicality point of view, I’m impressed with all of them. I like the shapes their bodies can make. Most of them look like they are covered in ropes – it’s amazeballs. But you know what? If I was a try-hard I could probably have the same body too.
Dom: Sorry for having more important things to do than run around in circles and try to jump far. But I think Mark Spitz was the coolest sports guy ever. That merman used to get more tail in two laps of the Olympic swimming pool than Shane Warne used to get on a three-week bender in Bollywood. It’s rumoured that, at the height of his Olympic swimming career, Mark Spitz was having sexual relations with as many as 60 fit birds a week – that doesn’t even include the ugly ones that surely he would have had every now and then, just to mix it up.
Adrian: Would he have had a dude every now and then? Swimmers often swing it both ways.
What do you think of the Australian team’s uniform?
Adrian: I think that they were a little too literal with their choice of designers.
Dom: Oh yarh, how original. We are making a sports uniform so we are going to get a sports brand to design the uniform.
Adrian: Oh yarh, Adidas. Wow. Ground-breaking. Well done, Australian Olympic Committee – they’ve only made 10,000 sports uniforms before. I reckon that our brand Athleticacaca would have been able to do something really special.
Dom: Except that we would have turned down any such offer because you would have to answer to so many bureaucrats designing that outfit. Can you imagine how painful that would be, to have to take fashion advice from politicians and sports marketers? Please – sorry for knowing what cool is and for not wanting to share it with you!
What do you think of Aussies living in London? Cool or not?
Adrian: I think that they’re all inherently missing their vitamin D and are all in danger of the Heathrow Injection.
Dom: Yarh, the Heathrow Injection is a very dangerous problem for fit young Aussies. They get over to London,
start smashing starchy carbs and then put on like 10kgs in a matter of weeks.
Adrian: Yuck. That’s so disgusting. Why would you eat carbs? I honestly don’t know why you would live in London, simply because of the weather.
Dom: I suppose there is the power of the 9/10 rule.
Adrian: Oh, yeah.
Dom: Do you want to explain it, or should I?
Adrian: No, it sounds totes better when you say it.
Dom: OK, so in Sydney, the average population is about an 8 out of 10. Sydney people are hot. Sorry bout it, but it’s true. So for anyone that is below that 8 mark, they really struggle to find decent-looking sexual partners. It’s the laws of the jungle, pretty elementary stuff really. But when they go to London, where the average population is about a 4/10, they automatically go up to a 9, hence increasing their opportunity to have sex with more attractive partners. So I’m looking forward to seeing Adrian go through that transition, and be with him on his journey to becoming a 9. He’s owed it. Life hasn’t been too kind to Adrian.
Adrian: Yarh, I can’t wait. Dom’s already a 10, anyway. Hey, what do you mean life hasn’t been too kind to me?
Adrian: No, I really want to know what you meant?
Dom: Seriously brah, nothing. Forget about it.
Adrian: I can’t.
Since you guys got super-popular on YouTube, how have your lives changed?
Dom: I hate the way this question sounds. It makes us sound like “viral sensations”. Eeeewwwww.
Adrian: What Dom is trying to say, is that we would actually prefer if people stopped watching our videos all together. Please boycott them, and don’t watch them, and don’t tell anyone about them. Because we are now being tempted by all of these opportunities to make money, and we don’t want that. We don’t want success. For us, momentum is the worst possible outcome for what we are trying so not hard not to achieve.
What else have you guys got coming up? Any big projects?
Adrian: We are playing the national Australian Parklife Tour, with the likes of Wiley, Plan B, Jack Beats, The Presets, Passion Pit, so that’s pretty exciting.
Dom: Don’t tell them about that, I thought that we were gonna keep that underground.
Adrian: We are. Nobody reads TNT.
Adrian: And we’ve also got another couple of songs coming out soon, so keep an eye out for those on YouTube.
Dom: Fuck man, didn’t we say that we were going to keep those underground as well?
Adrian: Yarh, but the same rule applies, because we’re still talking to the same guy from the same magazine.
Dom: True. Can we just not answer any more questions? I’m getting uncomfortable and this is starting to feel like we are talking to a journalist or something.
Adrian: Totes. Sorry man, we’ve gotta go. Been nice chatting.
Dom: Laters, brah.